Gentleman's Time

Festen

Sun, 27 Nov 2011 05:35:00 -0800

Happy holidays, loves of my life! With the festive season upon us once again, let’s not lose track of what the holidays are really about—BEING IN YOUR THIRTIES, LIVING ALONE IN A BASEMENT AND EATING TUNA OUT OF THE CAN WHILE WATCHING VIDEOS OF YOUR FRIENDS LOOKIN’ COOL EATING PIZZA ON YOUTUBE. Enjoy these precious moments. You’ve EARNED it!

Thanks: Uwe, Laura, Katie

Car Wash: A Benefit for Sarah Johnson

Sun, 30 Oct 2011 16:41:00 -0700

Sarah got a bunch of parking tickets and her car towed in San Francisco earlier this year while she was on crutches due to a broken foot. I decided to raise money to help pay off the fees that she accumulated because, you know, I have a real soft spot for cripples. My car wash idea didn’t quite pan out as I’d planned but at least I raised/am raising awareness? A passerby caught the action on video.

Pretty Party Place

Wed, 12 Oct 2011 12:32:01 -0700

Here’s a typical day at Uwe’s. NBD.

Eligible Bachelors: And Then There Were Two

Wed, 13 Jul 2011 16:47:39 -0700

I know it’s hard to believe but Uwe and I are STILL single! Please send love letters and marriage proposals to gentlemanstime[at]gmail.com and be sure to specify which eligible bachelor it is for. Please also like pizza, beer and Mariah. Kthnx.

Mirror: Jan and Brannon

Mon, 11 Jul 2011 21:31:10 -0700

It’s FINALLY summer in Portland! See you guys at the river!!!

Pie Dreams Really Do Come True!

Sat, 25 Jun 2011 09:32:00 -0700

It was always a dream of Uwe’s to get pied in the face and you may recall that this dream has already been fulfilled. We decided, however, to make this dream come true once again. I mean, wouldn’t you want to relive the best moment of your ENTIRE life?

13 Going on 30

Thu, 26 May 2011 00:03:50 -0700

Valerie Rodeo

Tue, 17 May 2011 08:18:00 -0700

Ladies and gentlemen, it is with great honor and pleasure that I share with you this li’l miracle. Without further ado…I present to you, dear faithful reader, Uwe Buble performing “Valerie” by Steve Winwood.

Can't Nobody Love You

Thu, 12 May 2011 01:55:00 -0700

MIA IRL

Tue, 10 May 2011 01:41:00 -0700

Dear Shola,

Where in the world are you?! Do you realize that it’s been MONTHS since we last sang a duet? MONTHS!!! Please remedy this situation immediately if not sooner. Kthnx.

Your DEAR friend,
\ˈal-zhon\

Logistics of Love

Tue, 03 May 2011 02:33:00 -0700

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE

You meet your soulmate. You fall in love with her.

Do you:
• Do nothing.
• Put yourself out there and tell her about how you’re in love with her.

You put yourself out there and tell her about how you’re in love with her. She’s absolutely terrified. Whatever you thought you had is over. You can’t sleep because all you’re thinkin’ about is how you two should be together. You make a breakup mix and play it over and over and over some more. You wallow and are fully immersed in the dissolution. But you will live.

You share your breakup mix on your blog.

01. To Love Somebody (PP Arnold)
02. Who’s Loving You (The Jackson 5)
03. Deep Shadows (Little Ann)
04. Just A Little Overcome (Tommy Tate)
05. Put Yourself In My Place (Azie Mortimer)
06. If It’s Over (Mariah Carey)
07. I Care 4 U (Aaliyah)
08. Without You (Harry Nilsson)
09. My Melancholy Blues (Queen)
10. Whenever You’re Ready (The Zombies)

Download

The Big Easy: After the Storm

Thu, 24 Mar 2011 15:41:10 -0700

When I was in New Orleans in November of 2010, Jeff and I rode around on bikes, wandered around abandoned buildings and cemeteries and ate shrimp po boys. You’re probably sick of hearing me talk about how magical this city is but really who cares? I <3 New Orleans!!! YOUDON’TEVENKNOW.

I <3 New Orleans

Mon, 07 Mar 2011 22:36:00 -0800

I was fortunate enough to visit New Orleans in November of 2010 and, in honor of Mardis Gras, here are some pictures that I took during that time that I’d like to share with you. I’ve decided that I’m going to be there for Mardis Gras next year AT ALL COSTS.

Fringe Fest Parade

Ida Flöreak <3 <3 <3

Marian Blair

Jeff and I found this at a bar in Uptown that had free food during a Saints game. You will live on forever, Mr. Astley. FOREVER.

I order a muthafuckin' pizza from you at 3:30 in the morning, cry myself to sleep watching The Notebook and you don't just leave my muthafuckin' pizza at my doorstep when you get here and I don't answer the door?! I woke up in a cold sweat hours later when I realized that I didn't get my pizza, rolled off the couch and sprinted to my doorstep completely naked and my muthafuckin' prepaid pizza was nowhere to be found. Fuck you. Fuck you in the face!!!

Tue, 25 Jan 2011 03:30:00 -0800

Srsly where’s my pizza?

The Big Easy: Moving Pictures

Wed, 12 Jan 2011 00:34:00 -0800

I’d have shot more video when I was in New Orleans but, you know, I didn’t want to look like a tourist (which I was). Here are just a few moments I captured that I’d like to share with you.

Story of My Life: Cry 'Til I Die

Thu, 09 Dec 2010 20:35:21 -0800

Welp, I ended up at Beulahland with Kate, Johanna and Lindsay last weekend. I got to talking with Johanna about the two women that I’m IN LOVE WITH but unfortunately live far, far away. And you know what advice Johanna gave me?

“You should stop wasting your time. It’ll never work out. You’re gonna be alone forever. Deal with it.”

So you know what I did? Welp, instead of going home and crying about not having either of these beautiful babes in my life I, uh, eh…

The Big Easy: Part 1

Sun, 28 Nov 2010 23:00:00 -0800

HELLO. GOODBYE.

So I’m finally able to take off enough time from work to be able to leave the Pacific Northwest for a vacation. And what better place to go than New Orleans?! I’d wanted to go ever since I read A Confederacy of Dunces about ten years ago and have romanticized the city in my head practically every day since. Also, one of my bestest buddies in the world lives there with his lovely girlfriend.

I arrive downtown from the airport about mid-afternoon and begin to walk to Jeff and Marian’s place in the Bywater neighborhood. I knew they’d still be at work by the time I’d get there but Marian’s friend Ida (who also happens to be visiting) would be around to let me in. I arrive at the shotgun style house, press on the doorbell and, to my surprise, am let in by an angel—an angel by the name of Ida! Ida, it turns out, is one major babe. Could it possibly get any better than being welcomed to the Big Easy by an extremely beautiful woman? Apparently, yes—when she also takes you to an incredible barbecue place!

Ida and I arrive at The Joint which is just a short walk from the house. We both get an IPA, and Ida orders a slice of pie. I decide to get a pulled pork sandwich with a side of mac & cheese. We head to the backyard and sit at a table with a good view of the biggest smoker I’ve ever seen in my life. We talk about important things like how there’s a time and place to listen to Mariah Carey. Then BOOM. “Honey” starts playing in the background! Ok so “Honey” didn’t start playing in the background. I’m making that part up. However, I’m convinced that if this had actually occurred we both would have immediately set our food and drinks aside, gotten up from our chairs and danced intimately with each other thus triggering an inevitable whirlwind romance even greater than the R. Kelly + Aaliyah romance. And we would be married by now. M-A-R-R-I-E-D.

We get back to the house, and Jeff and Marian arrive soon after. It’s my first night in New Orleans but unfortunately Ida’s last. We all decide to head out for dinner and drinks and end up at Jacques-Imo’s, a Creole and Cajun specialty restaurant in the Uptown neighborhood. It’s super crowded and there’s an hour and a half wait so we walk next door to the Maple Leaf Bar for some drinks after putting our names down on the waiting list. The Maple Leaf Bar reminds me of a typical Portland dive—wearing its history proudly. I feel right at home. I even experience a bit of nostalgia of pre-smoking ban dives in Portland as I witness a few patrons smoke cigarettes inside.

As we head back to Jacques-Imo’s I notice their sign on the building that reads, “Warm beer, lousy food, poor service.” Lovin’ it. We arrive and are seated quickly. I order Jambalaya and a Pabst and am thankful to be in the company of some of my favorite people in this magical city.

Canal Street: The Times Square of New Orleans?

This picture is actually from the second time I went to The Joint. Pork ribs with a side of cole slaw and beans. Seriously the best ribs, cole slaw and beans I’ve ever had in my life!

Marian (left) and Ida (right) at Jacques-Imo’s.

Jambalaya at Jacques-Imo’s.

No Matter What

Mon, 08 Nov 2010 07:13:42 -0800

Branny Cakes + Sir Lord Beaverton 4 Lyfe.

Eligible Bachelors

Sun, 07 Nov 2010 22:16:56 -0800

Guess what! Nope. We’re all single. Seriously, can you believe that?

Can't nobody love you

Thu, 04 Nov 2010 10:54:15 -0700

Good news! Google Maps has provided me with walking directions to Carina’s! Just think, in only 8 days and 21 hours of nonstop walking the love of my life and I can finally be reunited. Picture us at the park—the Golden Gate Bridge in the background—sitting on a quilted blanket with a picnic basket as we pair various cheeses with malt liquor and dine on a feast of Rice-A-Roni. <3 <3 <3